This graduation season, I proudly cheered as my son graduated from college and my daughter from high school. I have attended several additional graduations and continuations. From Early Childhood Education to Non-Traditional High School ceremonies, I’ve listened as teachers lavished students with praise, encouragement, and advice. I heard graduates’ voices tremble with emotion as they thanked their parents and teachers for believing in them. It got me to thinking about all of the people that helped me after I dropped out of high school. There were so many wonderful teachers, administrators, and parents that took the time to shape my future, but this letter is dedicated to Mrs. B.
Dear Mrs. B,
When I returned to high school after almost 15 months of being absent, you were the first person to sit down with me. As my counselor, you made it very clear that I was extremely behind. Call me a nerd, but I was so excited to be back! I couldn’t wait for you to get my schedule together, and send me on my merry way. Our visit was so short. You did most of the talking. You talked about me only having two and a half years left to get all my credits. I sat quietly until I saw my new classes. Do you remember what you picked? In spite of my former high academic grades in difficult subjects, you placed me in all remedial classes. When I said I didn’t need them, you ignored me. When I persisted, you spoke these words, ” It’s fine. You’re not going to graduate with your class. You probably won’t graduate for years“. I came in your office smiling and left feeling confused. See, I just assumed that because you were working at the school you wanted to help. I was so naïve to think that everyone had my best interest at heart.
Mrs. B, I went home and told on you that day. When I starting telling Mama what you said, it hit me! I could barely get the words out before tears stung my eyes. I was angry because you didn’t care about me. I was just some dumb black dropout who had the nerve to think I could make it. I wasn’t asking you to fix my grades, or make it easy. I was willing to do the work. I just wanted you to listen to me, and write down the classes I wanted. When you were overruled by your superiors and told to put me in the appropriate classes (cause my mama don’t play) you let out a heavy sigh and told me to leave your office. No words of encouragement. No apology.
This letter isn’t to dwell on the past, but to say thank you! I left your office determined to prove myself to you. Though you weren’t my teacher, you taught me a tremendous lesson that day. You taught me to speak up for myself, even if it meant challenging authority. You showed me that some people will make up their minds about me before I even open my mouth. You made me hungry for academic success. Best of all, you caused me to push myself harder than I knew I could.
On graduation day, I wasn’t thinking about you. I was marveling at my own achievements. I was thinking about how I took classes fulltime plus summer school to get my credits. I was thinking about how I managed to take care of my sick mother, our home, play sports, and still do well in school. As I looked in the mirror that morning, I didn’t see you. I saw the young girl sitting in your office two and a half years ago. She was triumphantly smiling back at me, ready to walk that stage with her class!
Won’t graduate? Here’s a list of things I won’t do:
Won’t let anyone determine my worth
Won’t let anyone dismiss my goals
Won’t be defined by stereotypes
Won’t be stopped by my circumstances
Won’t be done until Godis done
Whenever I talk to young people about their future, I let them know that I dropped out of school and dropped back in! And my favorite story to share is ours. You weren’t the only person to tell me I couldn’t do something, but Mrs. B, just like them, you were wrong!
No hard feelings, clearly you didn’t know any better.
