God has a funny way of getting our attention. We’re looking for the big thunderbolt in the sky, and he out here pinching us! Three things happened today that pinched my very core.
Beginning at 8am, I was injected with allergy shots every twenty minutes and then every thirty minutes for six hours. I took a restroom break around noon. Outside of the office, down the hall was a small two-stall restroom. When I returned to the office, the door was locked. For a minute I was panicked and then just confused. What are they doing that they had to leave me out here? I’ve been a human pin cushion and not feeling too great! Now I’m out in this dumb hallway alone. I don’t even have my phone to call inside.
When I got back in my room to continue my shots, I pulled out my phone and read about a bad car accident. As I was reading the eye-witness account, her words just didn’t ring true. For some reason, they really bothered me. I shook my head and just stopped reading. Never mind.
Lastly, to pass the time, I streamed a documentary. It drew me in and really got next to me. I saw a father who “killed” his child. He and his wife arrived late to church. She exited the hot car and angrily rushed inside while he grabbed his bible and keyboard. After service when they went to retrieve their son from the church daycare, he wasn’t there. He was still in the car.
By the end of my appointment, I could feel the pinching. It wasn’t the shots, it was God! I began to see a common thread in the things I “experienced” today. Of course, it’s normal to come upon a situation and see things from your point of view first, but we shouldn’t stop there. I shouldn’t stop there.
When I rushed out the office to go to the restroom, my main focus was on me and my needs. I wasn’t particularly concerned with the time because I knew I had at least two more hours of shots plus the visit with the doctor. I grabbed the doorknob expecting to just walk back in. To be honest the door being locked was not as serious as I internalized. It was lunchtime and everyday at that time, the medical assistants lock the door so they can eat. When they heard me at the door, they immediately let me back in. They explained why the door was locked and even apologized. They didn’t tell me when I left that I’d be left out there. They knew they were just steps away when I needed them.
When I read about the accident, I was reading from my own frame of reference. I’ve seen car accidents and immediately wondered what happened. How did they end up in the same lane? Whose fault was it? Is everyone okay? If I had been driving by the accident in the article, my vantage point would have been limited by my angle, direction travelling, obstructed view, and the road I’m supposed to be paying attention to. The eye-witness was standing at the intersection when the cars collided. Whether her story rang true or not, she saw what I didn’t see.
Watching the documentary was tough because I hate to see people suffer. It especially hurts me when I see fathers cry. I guess it’s because we expect men to be strong regardless of the situation. On a Sunday morning, this dad had a fight with his wife that spilled into their car ride and their worship. Though both were upset and just went into the building, the father was last in the car. In the weeks to come, the dad was so distraught that he bought a gun. One day he got his gun and left the house driving the same car in which his son died. When he found a place he thought was suitable, he pulled over. He got out of the front seat and slipped into the back. He said he wanted to see what his son would have seen. That’s when it struck me.
God hasn’t allowed me to “experience” these things for nought. He has been trying to show me all day that what I’m going through isn’t one-dimensional. Whether it’s what I’ve seen, heard, or experienced, there’s still another side to the story. I have to remember that when I’m hurt, it doesn’t mean that I’m the only one hurt. Maybe I don’t have all of the information I need to process my feelings properly. Hold up, does that mean that we can disagree with a person and still both be right? That’s an eye-opener!
Your perspective is carved from your own experiences, pain, disappointments, and yeah, biases. Not everyone is out to hurt you, mislead you, or even stop your progress. Some people are just doing the best they can from the place they’ve come. No, this isn’t an excuse for their behavior. It’s simply an opportunity for you to get to know yourself better. What colors how you see things? Is it hurt from your past? Unfulfilled expectations? Is it the direction you’re traveling? Or the road you’re supposed to be paying attention to? Do you ever slip into the back seat to see what others may be seeing? What is obstructing your view?
Is it possible that my pain is valid but my reaction misplaced? Hmmm. Like I said, God has a funny way of getting my attention. I’m in a pinch!
Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. Proverbs 4:7
